What is the cost of denying a partner the dignity of having there partner living with them?

Posted: July 2, 2013 in A thought for a day, Advance Prostate Cancer, Irish Immigration Problem

What is the cost of denying a partner the dignity of having there partner living with them because of immigration red tape caused by laws that were not thought out in a humane way. In Ireland I am not allow to live with my partner of four years four months. There is no position to allow for this and we live with it each day of our lives. Skype is our contact and it is on twenty-four seven in our homes. Thank God for broadband. We both take turns traveling to be with each other for time when the money is there as in our case it is a round trip of twenty four hours every time we have to see each other. All this cost and suffering on us because of Irish law that is not humane towards real people in situations like ours, no credit is taken into account of the years we have been together, and no way to move it on. The minister office seems to not know Irish law when you try to get them to do something on this. They shift the responsibility on an emigration officer as if he can make policy. He goes by the law and cannot change anything. It’s the minister and his top brass are the people responsible for chance and because it does not affect them or their family’s they just do not care.

Well let me tell you the cost to me and I am sure I am not alone on this. I have advance prostate cancer since 2010. It now gone into my spine and I am been treated for it. It is also in my bones. On each occasion, I was on my own going through treatment, as this state will not allow my partner live with me. We cannot drop everything in life to be there in an hour a day or even a week. Everything has to be planned and it takes time and a lot of money, not easy with cancer handing over you all the time. I have to register him, I am told each time I try to do something about this and to do that he has to be living with me for two years here in Ireland; however, he is not allow into Ireland for more than three months per year and that includes any European country he visits. This will be taken into account when he comes here. We live on a timetable textbook that decides how we spend our time in Ireland. If he uses it all up, it tuff luck for me. Next year is what I have to wait for to start all this over repeatedly. It seems to go on and on and no one cares.

If I want to drive a car I cannot without a licence, provision are made there for me to apply in my country, yet there is no provision for me to register my partner outside Ireland if they will not let him in to do so. We are four and a half years together and this arrogant state will not recognise we are a couple, as we have not fulfilled their impossible procedure that they setup.

This is very cruel as I am a thermal sick cancer person with not too much time on my side. We are going through hell while these blue boys in power play games with our relationship and the pain they are impose on us in this time of pity. I need my partner register and recognised, as so and this should have been done over two years ago. I need him now for my aftercare and love as everyone has from his or her love one. This behaviour from another human is deplorable. I am an Irish man and Daniel is my partner and if we could have married we would, however, again my state treats me as a second-hand citizen.

I need my partner living here with me doing what couples do in everyday life and if he had been here, I probably would not be in the situation I am now. Couples look out for each other and this state denied us that with immoral laws that did not make provision for our position. It is not that your department did not know of this, you just did not care, as it was not your problem. We have a lot of pain in our life and we do not want anymore. I want my partner register and all the time we have been together taken into account for our next step, which I hope, is marriage if life spars me.


Gerard Mac Sharry.

02nd July 2013.


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