It is never to late to move in life.

Posted: July 5, 2013 in Advance Prostate Cancer, Irish Immigration Problem, Life

Jamal Assoued PictureWell it four thirty in the morning and I am heading out to have my first shower to get rid of this hospital bug I seem to pick up while looking after my mother, this on top of my cancer returning. It has now moved into my spine and possible my bones. I had to pay for this information to get a test in Castlebar Hospitals other wards September was the date next appointment. I had sever back pains while I had called over to see Daniel in Panama and the doctor there advise me to go home straight away, and thought it was back problems which I always had in my life. I was been treated by my Doctor as an advance prostate cancer person and had complain before my last injection back in 25th June 2013. However, this did not surprise me as they rearrange am appointment for me on December to May. I had missed my May approximant in Galway Hospital as I was calling to see Daniel in Panama. I was having pains in my right leg where I had been receiving my injection. My doctor change legs. Despite telling my doctor of these back pains and saying, I am not waiting until September for my next appointment I will pay up front. Five days past and no signs, I called over and the phone number was given to me to try myself, which I did when I return to my parents’ home. We arrange it for Thursday 20thfor a scan of my back pain area. I drove in and the pain was unbearable, paid the cash up front first then had the scan. When they discover I had advance prostate which they did not know of with the first scan, she told me they have to redo the scan all over; however, this time it covered my full spine.

On leaving the room I told the woman there that I want them to send it on to Galway hospital as I am been treated there for cancer. She said she would if they want it. I got no CD as it was late and they were having problems with their PC. That was that and I headed home.

I knew while driving home I would not be taking my father into Galway hospital on Monday as driving was causing me too much pain. Jurying the weekend I ask Michael to take over which he did. On Friday my Mother played up again and my Father and had I terrible problems trying to get her of the floor into her bed. The phone call came for me, it was the consultant from Castlebar informing me my cancer had moved into my spine. I need to get into Galway hospital straight away.

When he heard what I was doing at that time he told me not to life anything as the pressure will lead to me been paralysed and then there was nothing that could be done. Get to a Galway hospital straight away. I called over to my GP just to see what all this was about all a sudden. He told me it was very grave and the pain I am in now will be nothing before the week is up. I got a proscription from him the hospital had requested and Michael my brother took me in my father’s jeep. I was tested for hospital bug and then isolated when I was dynodes with MRSA and put to bed lying on my back for a week before I was allow to sit up again. All along while this was happening I was going through ten sessions of radiation and very strong steroids to stop this cancer.

It has been very stressful when I also had to deal with problems at home that were imposed on me by my sister and mother interfering with home help I had thought was up and running two years ago. I turn out they did not sign the papers and as such this care potage could not be implement. Just before I had to leave for Hospital, the caretaker and I had a few words and all this information came forward to me. I told her I will sign the papers and she informs me it had to be your Mother. I called my Father in which annoyed him because he had to make a decision for once and I told my Mother I have had enough of this carrying on. I have a life, which you all in this family seem to take for granted and I want this sorted out here and now. She signed the papers and the district nurse said she had achieved more here today than she has done in the two years before. Later, when I mention this to my sister. It was a catalysed onto her to use for more abuse I have been receiving from her and her daughter overtime. We cannot give the care my mother need and when I ask my mother did she abject to going into care. She said she knows everything I would do for her was good and she did not mind, as she was not receiving it here. I try doing something for proper care for my mother. My father upset by me dragging him into making a decision again, sided once again against me and my pushy ways with his beloved daughter who does not live there 24/7.

When decisions have to be made in my family like this and my handicap sister care was another, I was the one who push them when I could see they were not up for this kind of caring anymore in there old age. I am the bad one now that the price one pays when your father does not take on his responsibilities as the man of the house. Therefore, I step in and that the way it has always been in my parents’ home, other word nothing would have been done.

Well this time I have decided I had to get out of my home of twenty-four years and now make it on my own with thermal cancer now coming up fast behind me. Let them get on with it. I have done my spell long enough. I am now in Ballina old people’s hospital on aftercare before my next appointment in Galway on the 11th of July 2013 and this will tell me my outcome and the time I have left. From this bed in Ballina hospital, I am planning my final time in this world and Daniel will be part of it when he gets into Ireland on this Master degree in accounts we are trying to get up and running. We need three years so that he can be here with me and I can finally register him as my partner. We are four and a half years together now; however, that is not taken into account, as this state has no policy for couple outside this state in the position we find ourselves. It is cruel and not the way to treat two people who are going to hell at this moment; However, we have to live with it and there another day to get through. Day by day is how I am taking it. All I do know so far this world has turned out to be a very cruel place when you are not with it with no compassion showing in any way towards the two of us at all that can move things. We have to find all the help we can and try to see how we can make this happen ourselves, before my time comes. We will never give up on this. Daniel is my partner for life regardless of our age and we have no problem with that and neither have our extended families. The story goes on.


Gerard Mac Sharry.

07th July 2013.


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